Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Is Your Ass Tingling Yet?!


It must be in anticipation of the Violent Fems spankdown you’re going to get this Thursday at 10pm at The Stonewall Inn!  That’s right, Me, Mistress WynterMistress Regan, and Mistress Alex will be there, palms aready for a good cause!  There might be other implements in use as well, just because we might feel like it.
All proceeds will go toward the formation of a sex worker health collective- more info here:
On November 29th, the PROS Network and PERSIST Health Project, two peer-led organizations focused on improving access to care, services, and rights for sex workers throughout NYC are hosting PROS/PERSIST: A Benefit for Peer-Led Sex Workers’ Rights & Services in NYC will be held at the historic Stonewall Inn. We’ll be raffling off a host of great prizes including fine art by Mark Dion, and feature a great lineup of performers doing readings, burlesque performances and more!
Tickets will be sold in increments of $10, $25, $50, and $100, and you can BUY ADVANCE TICKETS HEREDoors open at 7pm sharp!
Performances begin at 8pm
Raffle Prizes Announced: 9:30pm
Guest DJ Shomi Noise and Lap dance and spanking booths open at 10pm
Where: Stonewall Inn, 53 Christopher Street, NYC
We are holding a benefit to raise funds for the following activities:
To expand access to care for sex workers by laying the foundation to open up NYC’s first health clinic run by and for sex workers, similar to St James Infirmary in SF
For advocacy and policy change to decriminalize sex work and prostitution in NY state, and to remove criminal penalties from all consensual sexual behavior (such as racial profiling, immigration laws, and public space)
To conduct best practices training and capacity-building for health care providers, law enforcement, social workers, legal service providers, and community members
And Much More!
NOVEMBER 29th, 2012: PROS/PERSIST: A Benefit for Peer-Led Sex Workers’ Rights & Services in NYC
Stonewall Inn, 53 Christopher St, NYC

Come on down and say hello!


xo.

Monday, October 29, 2012

In the wake of impending disaster...

Here are a few photos from my last shoot!   Please feel free to leave a comment not just about how beautiful I look, but also about topics that you would like to hear me pontificate upon in the future.

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Coney Island will never recover.

These are some of the outtakes from our shoot in Coney Island a few weeks ago.  "Our" meaning Mistress Alex and I.  If you want to see the proper ones, click on my gallery.  But these are the fun ones.

Stay tuned (like you won't) for karate and latex stuff.

 

xoxo.



 

 

 

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

This is why.

I have been getting a lot of questions regarding my interests and why I don't itemize them on my website.  First of all, there are way too many things to list and I think it is a bit ridiculous to write everything out.   Also, in all honesty, it's not really about whether I get to tie someone down and whip them, or whether I get to electrify their balls, but more about the interaction itself. Whipping someone can be incredibly boring if there's not any chemistry.  This is because it's an energetic response I'm looking for, and not simply the imposition of my will.  I mean, sure, there are some activities I enjoy more than others, and I get really excited over certain toys, but the thing that is so addictive to me (although I don't really like that word) is whether I feel like I am hitting a certain spot with a subject psychologically.  It requires a lot more focus, but yields a greater reward.

So, whenever someone asks me what my "specialty" is, or what I am known for, I don't ever really know what to say.  I don't want to be known as the person to go to for X.  There are certain things (such as whipping) that require a higher level of skill, sure.  But to me it is far more important to make you crumble.

And that's all you need to know.

 

xo.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Best Conversation Part Two.


Like a bad joke that you never get tired of, here is yet another installment of what I'm going to call, "Thursdays with Mordi".


Enjoy:




mordi:  Hey daddy

What's goin on?

Out in da catskills now



 Sent at 11:16 PM on Thursday



 

mordi:  Its no more miss its master lol



 Sent at 11:18 PM on Thursday




me:  oh you are just looking to get horny now, aren't you?

do you know that I got my vagina back today?




mordi:  Just discussed u with a friend



Cum of it?




me:  got tired of having that cock. couldn't keep it because was jerking off too much




mordi:  Ure kidding?

Wanted to come over with fay



 

me:  and have her suck my cock??




mordi:  Yes


me:  oh that's too bad



she'd have to settle for rubber

although i guess i could get it re-attached




mordi:  Did u really have one?

Are ure just pulling my leg?



 

me:  hahahaha!

i guess you'll never know.




 mordi:  I think I do:)



 

me:  you are too clever for words!




mordi:  When u told its 14



inches that's when I got suspicious

If u would say 8-9 would of made abit of sense




me:  Why would I lie to you?

Modern science is an awe-inspiring thing.




mordi:  I'm sooo happy now luvya baby




me:  you're da best.




mordi:  Just read recently on



news about da longest cock

Having problems when going through security

An his was just about 14 in




me:  I had a bf who was a bit over 12"




mordi:  So it didn't sound right in 1st place




me:  ive seen people with bigger, though




mordi:  Possible




me:  no, i can get any kind i want!

i look in the catalogue and they gave it to me, but it was too heavy.




 mordi:  No too many 14s around

Don need more then 9




me:  well, you're just not being ambitious enough




mordi:  Maybe thick but not longer

Well I'm realistic



Sent at 11:29 PM on Thursday




mordi:  Anyway nice talkin to u babe luvya gnite<3



 Sent at 11:35 PM on Thursday













Monday, August 13, 2012

Best Conversation Ever.

This is a gchat exchange I had with one of my former clients who's a little on the shall we say...  naive (?) side.  I absolutely despise gchatting, but thought I would have some fun.  "Me" is clearly Me.  Enjoy:

me: I got a sex change, didn't you hear???

mordi: No omg
Tell me about it please


me: Yeah, I have a huge dick now
all the way down my thight


mordi: Mean it??


me: thigh


mordi: Wow ure so brave


me: yes, i feel more whole as a person


mordi: Did ure voice change too?


me: yes, and I am growing a beard!


mordi: Don't do that


me: I have huge balls now too.


mordi: U look so beautiful
What could be better then a good looking woman with a big dick


me: yeah, but now i have a huge mandingo cock and swinging fucking hairy bowling balls between my thighs
gee, im not sure.


mordi: How big?


me: 14 inches
you can pick them out of a catalogue now


mordi: Oh my g-ddddd
Where do u hide it?


me: it was same day surgery too, in and out
Why would I want to hide it???


mordi: When was that?
When u go out-must be quite obvious
Wow now I understand y u were hooked up to those vids


me: It is very obvious, yes.
what vids? oh of gay cock sucking?


mordi: Somthing -- daddy
Those jail movies


me: Oh, SCUM. With Ray Winstone.


mordi: Yups


me: It's so big, I can suck it myself now
I can get the tip in my mouth


mordi: Wow wow
Real big
Getting me scared omg
Fucked already with it?


me: yeah, i made a bunch of guys choke on it in a big leather daddy circle jerk the other night


mordi: Gotto cum see u now
Didn't invite me


me: i know, right? I'm stroking it right now
I can hardly get my hand around it


mordi: Fucked any girls yet?


me: i have to use two hands!


mordi: Thick too?
No way


me: oh yes


mordi: When did u get it?


me: today!
no wait, a few days ago
i haven't slept because i've been jerking it constantly


mordi: Ure so strong wow
Real daddy now
How many times can u cum?


me: I'm unsure, but it's like a damned cum sprinkler


mordi: Now u gotto tell what's more pleasure to fuck? R getting fucked?


me: I am just enjoying cumming all over my room on every wall


mordi: Ure so horny mam wow
No mam anymore man lol


me: Yes, I'm just a big hunk of man meat.
Beefcake
Big Daddy Beefcake, that's what I make the circle jerk guys call me.
Down at Rawhide.


mordi: What do ure gfs say about it?


me: Have you ever been there?
My girlfriends don't know!
They are going to be shocked!!


mordi: Rawhide?


me: Yes, the gay bar.


mordi: Where's that?


me: In Chelsea, of course.


mordi: Na I'm not gay


me: Yeah, me neither.

Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Oh, say can you see...

...my fucking foot in your ass, DC!

I am feeling more and more patriotic as the time comes nearer for my visit to Our Nation's Capital. Well, patriotic or violent, I can never tell the difference. Ha ha! Wink wink.

I know you're just dying to read the details, so I will oblige you (this time):

- I will be there from August 1st to the 4th.

- I will be available for sessions with Mistress Wynter and Miss Maya Sinstress. Miss Maya will be leaving on the 3rd, so hurry up and book if you dare.

- You can also get me alone...


Okay, so enough dawdling. Email me at mistressveronicanyc@gmail.com to apply for being an outlet for my pent up frustration with Obama! :)


xoxo.

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Sometimes I wish I had a twin.

So I could fuck her. I know, I know, it would be incest and everything. And maybe rape if she didn't want to. Nah, I'm kidding, I would never rape my twin. Can you fuck a hologram?? No, right? Damn it!!

Monday, June 25, 2012

Pride Parade Ponderings

Well, Gay Pride has come and gone. Such a fun time. It seems like you can go to a different party every night, and that it goes on for far longer than is reasonable.

I don't mean to toot my own horn (although it's so easy!), but have been going (off and on) since the 90's. I was a teenager, and not "out". I wasn't sure if I was gay, as I hadn't tried being with a girl yet. I was (and am) lucky enough to have a sister who was a crazy pagan lesbian vegetarian counter-culturalist forward-thinker who took me to Pride and all kinds of festivals where I saw Kim Airs wearing a strap-on and traffic cones on her breasts, amongst other things. It was exquisitely bizarre, and I am so grateful for those glimpses, being brought up in a very conventional environment.

But as I was waiting and waiting for the float I was on to start moving yesterday, I got frustrated. I mean, it took us four damned hours just to get started. Then I began thinking about the first time I went to the parade (when it was technically a "march", which is different). I remember my sister being hesitant about taking me because there was an actual level of danger. It's hard to imagine today, but back then the "march" was an act of protest. It was defiant. We are talking before "Will & Grace", before "Glee", clearly, before "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert" went on goddamned fucking Broadway but was a small film your friends told you about that weirdly starred Agent Smith from "The Matrix". The shit was Real. You could get things thrown at you, there were bomb threats, and about 20% of the people there were protesting against it. For all of these reasons, I stopped being frustrated and realized how far everything has come. It's good that the parade is so large and so popular.

When I was a kid, I was spellbound by the freakish levels of abject randomness and how comfortable everyone was with whatever fantastical creature the march welcomed anyone to be. I fell in love with drag queens, and smiled at them with a starry-eyed stalker-like quality which I'm sure was a little scary- but which I still do because I find them absolutely bewitching. I met a curious man with door knockers in his nipples and scarification all over his chest (who was a banker in his vanilla life, not surprisingly to any of us, but which was to my 16 year old mind). It was probably the first time in my life I felt genuinely afraid and happy at the same time (probably a feeling a lot of bottoms can relate with). Especially when I saw Dykes on Bikes, who were at the very front. I remember being scared by the sound of the Harleys, and then burst into tears. I'm not sure why. It's silly, really. I mean, their name alone is pretty ridiculous. But I think it was the first time I had seen a powerful group of women en masse wielding machines with utter assuredness. It was an unabashed expression of female power and toughness, and it overwhelmed me. Now that I think about it, the placement of the biker babes was probably strategic. Not only because motorcycles are unreliable when stopping and starting, but it's a show of force in an otherwise vulnerable seeming population. (Lest we forget drag queens started the Stonewall Riot- which is the reason Pride exists).

Sure, Pride has become very commercialized, it's lost a lot of it's protest "edge", it's too large and clunky, it disturbs traffic, and the sheer defiant excitement of being outrageous in the face of forceful opposition is gone. But while I was looking out into the crowd of people yesterday-- smiling and waving and cheering and dancing- I felt the spirit of freedom of expression and universal concepts of love and acceptance are still at the heart. However you want to be, you can be. With enthusiasm. I'm pretty sure that having the experience of going when I was 16 did something toward assuring me that whatever pansexual, kinky, bizarre feelings I was having were fine, and even a positive thing. And I'm cool with that.


xoxo.

Serving some Pride Clown realness, bitches!

Thursday, June 21, 2012

3 Whole Free Minutes!

On Niteflirt. With me!

Ha, ha, not much of a deal. But see if you can amuse me regardless... If you're a speed talker you could probably get an entire scene in!

Click for the web's best phone sex on Niteflirt.com
Phone Sex on NiteFlirt -- Speak to your desire

Saturday, June 9, 2012

A good cheek pounding, and it's rewards...

Last night, I had no idea how much fun I would have...  Thank you, my dear!

I had decided earlier in the night that I wanted to use my hands to torture my sub, so didn't bother to bring any implements to the party.  He can take a lot of impact, so I decided I wanted to go to town on his ass (he was wearing assless chaps, so practically begging for it).  We started out with spanking, which made loud thwacking noises throughout the room.  I was surprised and delighted by the sound, and smiled for a moment to myself of how compatible my hand is with his buttocks.  I continued with measured, steady smacks until his ass was red and warm.  My hands felt the same way, but I didn't care because the sound and his reactions and his surrender were so satisfying.   I then held his head in place by his hair to let him know that there would be no thrashing and no resistance (I might have stroked it too, to calm him...)  I then got the idea to punch his ass.  Bent over the bench, I gave him some soft reverse punches to warm him up.  He didn't say anything...  so I knew he was ready for more.  Keeping my fists close to my ears, from a fighting stance I twisted my body forward, bringing with it the impact of my tightened fist.  His back arched, and he positioned himself for another.  I kept punching and hearing the "thwack" noise, and twisting, keeping my impact at a steady medium force at first, and then adding one hard one every so often to shock him.  I pulled his hair from his eyes, looked at him and saw the puppy dog look that I love to see from any sub when he's in the throes of my passion.  I bent him over again, and gave him a blizzard of hard punches to his ass.  Twist, thwack, twist, thwack, twist, thwack!  I rubbed him and bent over him, hugging him from behind, pinching a nipple to remind him that his plight might not be over just yet.

And it wasn't.  Now...  I would not normally do this to anyone walking down the street (although when someone walks into me while staring at their phone, I feel like it), but my sub and I are two risk-aware kinky adults.  In martial arts, the abilities to be precise both target-wise and with degree of impact are tantamount.  I have been practicing for three years, so when I got the idea (let's call it more an "itch") to punch my sub in the cheek-  I knew I could punch him there to hurt him, and not do any permanent damage.  I told him I wanted to, and he seemed excited by the idea.  The first punch was light-- I was gauging my distance and force, in martial arts we would call this a "check".  The second punch was a bit harder, but right on target.  The wet thwack was loud, but not really loud enough :).    I made sure he was ready for a harder third punch-- I connected perfectly and the sound coming out of my fist and his cheek was the plump crack I wanted.  So satisfying.  So great.  I kissed his cheek.  He kissed my hand.  I hugged him again, it felt so good.

When I sat down, I realized that I had done this:


And I love it!!  A wonderful reminder of a tremendously fun night.

xoxo.

Thursday, May 24, 2012

:D

Monday, May 7, 2012

VIOLENT FEMS WELCOME MISTRESS SERVALAN!



Get ready to put your big boy pants on, as we will be inducting MISTRESS SERVALAN into the VIOLENT FEMS Hall of Fame on Sunday, May 27th 7pm at BillyMark’s West! This jet-setting Australian beauty only graces us with her presence once every few years, so we are ecstatic to celebrate her arrival by leaving a bevy of bruised and broken boys in her wake!

A bit of background on our guest of honor:

Known by the authorities variously as The Duchess, aka The Trainer, aka The Flossie Aussie, she is the great-granddaughter of a peer banished to the colonies for unmentionable reasons. Amongst her various talents, Duchess learned to control large animals as a child on her family property... she also rode horses.

In recent years she has has travelled extensively sometimes just one step ahead of the authorities - sailing the world by private yacht leaving a trail of well-trained and well marked creatures in every port. Interpol estimates she may be planning to infiltrate the United States where she has been linked to the well known and nefarious Violent Fems gang...

More information can be found here, on her website (although for shame if you have not already visited it many times over...):(Visit Mistress Servalan's website)

Oh, the nefariousness we will share! Oh the horrors that the subs of New York will endure! Oh, what a treat for everyone involved!

THIS IS A FEMDOM PARTY. NO CISGENDER MALE DOMS ALLOWED TO GET JIGGY ON OUR TURF.

A note on how it goes down:

We consider this party to be far far removed from the run-of-the-mill fetish party in the sense that it is more a theater in the round. We dress up, we have certain people on whom we stage “attacks” (the attackees), we use gang implements, mostly, rather than whips and floggers, and we’re also friendly. You will not come to the party and stand around being bored waiting for someone to pay attention to you. If you are patient and don’t get in our way, we eventually say hello to everyone. You just have to be patient and respectful. Should I state that one more time? Patient and respectful, thanks!

There are two tiers, as you well know: $10 for observers, and $50 for ATTACKEES Don’t know what an attackee is, but are interested? Email me at mistressveronicanyc@gmail.com BillyMark's West is located on 29th St and 9th Ave in NYC.

**FYI, the party starts promptly and ends at 11pm, so if you show up at 10pm, you might miss the hot action! If you come before 7pm, you will be thrown out, and not in a good way.**

IF YOU STILL DON’T KNOW WHO WE ARE, PUNCH YOURSELF IN THE DICK AND THEN CLICK HERE: http://www.violentfems.com



xoxo.

Da Kingpin

Saturday, May 5, 2012

Submissive Men vs. Drag Queens

 

A quote from Andy Warhol:

"Drag queens are living testimony to the way women used to want to be, the way some people still want them to be, and the way some women still actually want to be.  Drags are ambulatory archives of ideal moviestar womanhood.  They perform a documentary service, usually consecrating their lives to keeping the glittering alternative alive and available for not-too-close inspection. ... I'm fascinated by boys who spend their lives trying to be complete girls, because they have to work so hard -- doubletime -- getting rid of all the tell-tale male signs and drawing in all the female signs.  I'm not saying it's the right thing to do, I'm not saying it's a good idea, I'm not saying it's not self-defeating and self-destructive, and I'm not saying it's not possibly the single most absurd thing a man can do with his life.  What I'm saying is, it is very hard work.  You can't take that away from them.  It's hard work to look like the complete opposite of what nature made you and then to be an imitation woman of what was only a fantasy woman in the first place.  When they took the movie stars and stuck them in the kitchen, they weren't stars any more -- they were just like you and me.  Drag queens are reminders that some stars still aren't just like you and me."   

Warhol was a condescending fucking asshole, but he had a point (not about the self-defeating, self-destructive part).  Drag queens were and are stewards of the female archetype.  As are Dominatrices, which is why submissive men are drawn to us.  Look at almost any Dominatrice's website:  the nurse, the schoolteacher, the femme fatale, the equestrian.  The list goes on.  Drag queens express femininity in much the same way.  Their focus is more on hollywood glamour for the most part, but the notion of playing a character remains.

Something really funny about straight men is that they get really uncomfortable around drag queens.  You might be thinking to yourself, "Not me! All my best friends are drag queens!"  To which I say, calm down, Princess.  I'm not trying to attack anyone.  It's just an interesting phenomenon-- which I was reminded of at a friend's brunch a few weeks ago.  We had RuPaul's Drag Race playing in the background, and were commenting and screeching at it like any normal people would do :), when one submissive man (who until then I had thought was very open-minded-- and trust me, he should be) was totally flummoxed.  He balked.  He couldn't believe that they were embarrassing themselves like this...  blah blah blah.  I tried to explain how important I think drag culture is, but discovered he could not understand.  Or didn't want to... Well, shit, man.  That's so fucking lame.  And so fucking banal.  Oh really?  You're a straight white dude who doesn't want to understand where a stigmatized group of people are coming from?  Really?  Surprise.  But it's especially disheartening to me coming from a submissive guy, because I expect them to be smarter and more enlightened than the average Joe.  By virtue of being stigmatized!!  I see this discomfort over and over again at every drag performance I attend.  The drag queens must see it too, or else they wouldn't take the men up on stage to perform simulated sex acts.  The men with their girlfriends immediately seem out of their element.  And I don't think it's just because they know they're going to get made fun of.  They're going to be prey.  Perhaps it's the first time they feel sexually vulnerable.  I think most women have the experience of being around large groups of men and know they are being evaluated for their potential sexual whathaveyou.  Men come to drag shows having never had this experience and their anxiety is palpable.  They don’t know how to handle it.  It's funny to see, actually.

But it also pisses me off.  I'm sure there are a shit ton of cisgender female Dommes who are weirded out by drag queens.  I don't mean to imply this is purely a sub or purely a guy thing.  However, I don't think we realize how much we resemble drag culture not only in terms of powerful feminine archetypes, but also in terms of stigmatization re: being seen as scary or fucked up, or essentially leper-like untouchables.  There is a cultural idea that there is something psychologically “gone wrong” with kinky people, which we all know is simply not true.  Or more precisely, it’s an oversimplification of a world where fear or the threat of fear plays a strong role.  Drag culture is no different in these ways.  Gender fucking is scary to people.  Even Warhol saw it as pathological.  (He was one to talk!)

So this fear or rejection of people who fuck with gender is similar to a fear many express toward those with alternative sexualities.  Or as I like to call us- sexuality fuckers.  Until I think of something with fewer syllables...  Fuck fuckers would be funny, but alas, a bit redundant.

Not familiar with drag culture?  Watch the definitive documentary for free, here (it’s a little over an hour, and incredibly fascinating):

Paris Is Burning

Friday, April 6, 2012

odd fetishes

lady who loves the berlin wall

lady who loves an amusement park ride

lady who wants to be parapalegic

objectum sexuals and how they differ from fetishists.  perhaps they are fetishists with a pygmalion complex?

what can we learn from them?

is it an extreme form of naming your car?

zit popping fetishes

why don't they exist?  it's almost as bad as poop.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

It's Aliiiive!

The picture below is from my last session with Frank, who made me the clip attachments because he's a glutton for punishment.

Looking closely, as I know you want to (but will probably regret), I have electrode pads sticking to either side of his balls, and 25 gauge needles through his scrotal skin.   Then, taking the alligator clips that were plugged into my Erostek, I attached them to the needles.  He described the pain as "piercing".  Well, duh!

Are you horrified?  Good.  Kind of gives a new meaning to the phrase, "Tingly Naughty Bits".

 

xoxo.

Monday, February 6, 2012

Violent Fems "Strike" A Pose

This is just a small taste of our most recent photoshoot! Notice how incredibly cool we all look. We based it on a combination of The Hustler with Paul Newman, and Reservoir Dogs. Courtesy of Natasha Gornik! See more of her work here: natashagornik.com

DON'T MISS FEBRUARY 19TH! OUR NEXT PARTY! SEE POST BELOW!

Waiting for a victim...


The last thing you will see...


Jauntily displaying my weapon.


Eightball in the corner pocket, ba-da-bing!


This is an actual random man. Not kidding. Volunteering for punishment!


See post below for more party details. Damn, we're cool!


xoxo.

Friday, January 27, 2012

VIOLENT FEMS ST. VALENTINE'S DAY MASSACRE: FEB 19th 7pm

 



Click on the image to enlarge it!

Badabing, bitches! Get up against the wall and raise your fucking hands up, because The Violent Fems are taking no prisoners this time. It's (near) Valentine's Day, which means we will rip your hearts out and stomp on them, mob style. Why, you say? Because we got beef, and we got it BAD.

You wanna prove you can be part of the "organization"? You wanna prove you're a stand-up guy? Then PM or email Mme Veronica: mistressveronicanyc@gmail.com to get an interview for being attacked. THE CUT OFF DATE FOR BECOMING AN ATTACKEE IS FEB 12TH. If you just want to come and observe, you can show up Feb 19th, pay $10, and wish you were part of the action.

THIS IS A FEMALE DOMINATED, MALE SUBJUGATED PARTY. NO MALE DOMS ALLOWED.

We consider this party to be far far removed from the run-of-the-mill fetish party in the sense that it is more a theater in the round. We dress up, we have certain people on whom we stage “attacks” (the attackees), we use “gang” implements, mostly, rather than whips and floggers, and we’re also friendly. You will not come to the party and stand around being bored waiting for someone to pay attention to you. If you are patient and don’t get in our way, we eventually say hello to everyone. You just have to be patient and respectful. Should I state that one more time? Patient and respectful, thanks!

There are two tiers, as you well know: $10 for observers, and $50 for ATTACKEES Don’t know what an attackee is, but are interested? Again, PM Mme Veronica or email me at mistressveronicanyc@gmail.com

**FYI, the party starts promptly and ends at 11pm, so if you show up at 10pm, you might miss the hot action! If you come before 7pm, you will be thrown out, and not in a good way.**

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

My recent letter to The Center for Sex Positivity

Hello,

I just want to say that I think your organization is really fantastic. I used to live in Seattle, and thanks to your community (it was called The Wet Spot then, circa 2000) I was introduced to BDSM and the concepts of SSC when I first started exploring this lifestyle. Not everyone gets such a supportive, informed first experience, so I want to say thank you.

I also have a question about some of the language used to describe sex positivity, particularly on your FAQ section, describing What Is Sex Positive Culture:

"The sex-positive movement is an ideology which promotes and embraces open sexuality. The sex-positive movement is a social and philosophical movement that regards all consensual sexual activities as fundamentally healthy and pleasurable, and encourages sexual pleasure and experimentation."

My question is about the wording of the particular phrase, "all consensual activities are fundamentally healthy". I am a dominatrix, so have had many people consent to playing with me. I know very well what this looks like. However, I have also had colleagues be given consent (in transactional and lifestyle situations) to perform activities they were not fully trained in, or perhaps knew were extremely dangerous but did anyway (a sub came to me after someone had caned his kidneys- in my experience, this is universally unsafe). This sort of manipulation can mask itself as consent, but is clearly not what you mean to be included in the phrase.

So, although many activities are consented to, whether they are "fundamentally healthy" or not, I believe is sort of a naive notion. As a kinky person, I believe that it is the right of any individual to have whatever done to their body that they wish. I would hope that it is SSC if done in a BDSM context.

I know that the above statement is a carefully thought-out political movement-wide notion. It is also on many other blogs and websites that I have found about sex positivity. I am hoping that someone could possibly qualify the phrase, or start a dialogue to make it more precise. Perhaps by adding "safe and sane" to it, which are already a part of our lexicon.

Thank you for your time.


Sincerely and Warmly,


Veronica
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